Battling Depression: Hope for the Holidays

25 Ways to Find Joy and Balance During the Holidays
Feeling down during the holidays can be tough.
By R. Morgan Griffin

Feeling down during the holidays can be tough, especially since you seem so out of step with the world. Everyone else seems to be beaming, ruddy-cheeked, bursting with holiday spirit. You’re feeling wretched and exhausted.

But here’s something to cheer you up the next time you’re stuck in a room of revelers at a holiday party: Plenty of them are probably unhappy, too.

“I think a lot of people would say that the holidays are the worst time of the year,” says Ken Duckworth, MD, medical director of the National Alliance on Mental Illness. “They’re just straight up miserable, and that’s not only for people with clinical depression.”

So if the family gatherings, the endless parties, and the shopping get you down, you’re hardly alone. But people with depression -- or who have had depression in the past -- need to be especially careful when coping with holiday stress. While it might take some conscious effort on your part, you can reduce stress -- and maybe even find some holiday joy, too. Here are some tips.

Finding the Holiday Spirit: Emotions
1. Keep your expectations modest. Don’t get hung up on what the holidays are supposed to be like and how you’re supposed to feel. If you’re comparing your holidays to some abstract greeting card ideal, they’ll always come up short. So don’t worry about holiday spirit and take the holidays as they come.

2. Do something different. This year, does the prospect of the usual routine fill you with holiday dread rather than holiday joy? If so, don’t surrender to it. Try something different. Have Thanksgiving at a restaurant. Spend Christmas day at the movie theater. Get your family to agree to skip gifts and instead donate the money to a charity.

3. Lean on your support system. If you’ve been depressed, you need a network of close friends and family to turn to when things get tough, says David Shern, PhD, president and CEO of Mental Health America in Alexandria, Va. So during the holidays, take time to get together with your support team regularly -- or at least keep in touch by phone to keep yourself centered.

4. Don’t assume the worst. “I think some people go into the holidays with expectations so low that it makes them more depressed,” says Duckworth. So don’t start the holiday season anticipating disaster. If you try to take the holidays as they come and limit your expectations -- both good and bad -- you may enjoy them more.

5. Forget the unimportant stuff. Don’t run yourself ragged just to live up to holiday tradition. So what if you don’t get the lights on the roof this year? So what if you don’t get the special Christmas mugs from the crawl space? Give yourself a break. Worrying about such trivial stuff will not add to your holiday spirit.

6. Volunteer. Sure, you may feel stressed out and booked up already. But consider taking time to help people who have less than you. Try volunteering at a soup kitchen or working for a toy drive. “You could really find some comfort from it,” says Duckworth, “knowing that you’re making a small dent in the lives of people who have so little.”
Finding the Holiday Spirit: Family
7. Head off problems. Think about what people or situations trigger your holiday stress and figure out ways to avoid them. If seeing your uncle stresses you out, skip his New Year’s party and just stop by for a quick hello on New Year’s Day. Instead of staying in your bleak, childhood bedroom at your stepfather’s house, check into a nearby hotel. You really have more control than you think.

8. Ask for help -- but be specific. See if your spouse will lug out the decorations. Ask your sister to help you cook -- or host the holiday dinner itself. Invite a friend along on shopping trips. People may be more willing to help out than you expect; they just need some guidance from you on what to do.

9. Don’t worry about things beyond your control. So your uncle and your dad get into a fight every holiday dinner and it makes you miserable. But remember your limits. You can’t control them. But you can control your own reaction to the situation.

10. Make new family traditions. People often feel compelled to keep family holiday traditions alive long past the point that anyone’s actually enjoying them. Don’t keep them going for their own sake. “Start a new holiday tradition instead,” says Gloria Pope, Director of Advocacy and Public Policy at the Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance in Chicago. “Create one that’s more meaningful to you personally.”

11. Find positive ways to remember loved ones. Holidays may remind you of the loved ones who aren’t around anymore. But instead of just feeling glum, do something active to celebrate their memory. For instance, go out with your sisters to your mom’s favorite restaurant and give her a toast.

Finding the Holiday Spirit: Parties
12. Don’t overbook. “The holidays last for weeks and weeks,” says Pope. “People really need to pace themselves or they’ll get overwhelmed.” So don’t say yes to every invitation willy-nilly. Think about which parties and you can fit in -- and which ones you really want to attend.

13. Don’t stay longer than you want. Going to a party doesn’t obligate you to stay until the bitter end. Instead, just drop by for a few minutes, say hello, and explain you have other engagements. The hosts will understand that it’s a busy time of year and appreciate your effort. Knowing you have a plan to leave can really ease your anxiety.

14. Have a partner for the party. If the prospect of an office party is causing holiday stress, talk to a friend and arrange to arrive -- and leave -- together. You may feel much better knowing you have an ally and a plan of escape.
Finding the Holiday Spirit: Shopping
15. Forget about the perfect gift. If you’re already feeling overwhelmed, now is not the time to fret about finding the absolute best gift ever for your great aunt or your mailman. Remember: everybody likes a gift certificate.

16. Shop online. Save yourself the inconvenience, the crowds, and the horrors of the mall parking lot by doing the bulk of your shopping online.

17. Stick to a budget. The cost of holiday shopping mounts quickly and can make people feel out of control and anxious. So draw up a budget long before you actually start your shopping and stick to it.

Finding the Holiday Spirit: Self-Care
18. Stay on schedule. As much as you possibly can, try to stick with your normal routine during the holidays. Don’t stay too late at parties. Don’t pull an all-nighter wrapping presents. Disrupting your schedule and losing out on sleep can make your mood deteriorate.

19. Exercise. While you may not feel like you have the time to exercise during the holidays, the benefits are worth it. “We know that exercise has a pretty strong anti-anxiety, anti-depression effect,” says Duckworth. You can work physical activity into your errands. When you’re shopping, take a few extra laps around the mall. Walk your Christmas cards to the post office instead of driving.

20. Eat sensibly. When you’re facing a dozen holiday parties and family gatherings between now and New Year’s, it’s hard to stay committed to a sensible diet. But try. Eating healthy may keep you feeling better -- physically and emotionally. On the other hand, don’t beat yourself up if you go overboard on the cookie platter in the break room. It’s not a big deal. Just get back on track the next day.

21. Don’t rely on holiday spirits (or other substances.) “The holidays are a time of heavy drinking,” says Duckworth. “It’s a common strategy for getting over anxiety about holiday parties or having the boss as your Secret Santa.” Remember that alcohol is itself a depressant and abusing it will leave you feeling worse. It also may not be safe for people taking antidepressant medication, says Pope.

22. Try a sun lamp. As the daylight grows shorter, lots of people find their mood gets gloomier. While some have diagnosed seasonal affective disorder (SAD), even people who don’t may still have a seasonal aspect to their depression. Talk to your doctor about trying a sun lamp. It could improve your mood.

23. If you take medication, don’t miss doses. In the hustle of the holidays, it’s easy to slack off and miss medication, says Pope. Don’t let that happen. Make sure that you’re up-to-date on your refills, too.
24. If you see a therapist, have extra meetings. To stay grounded, plan ahead and schedule some extra sessions during the holiday season. Or you could ask about the possibility of doing quick phone check-ins.

25. Give yourself a break. “The holidays can make some people dwell on their imperfections, their mistakes, the things they’re not proud of,” Duckworth tells WebMD. But try to cut yourself some slack. “This is not an easy time of year for a lot of people,” Duckworth says. “Be gentle with yourself.”It is the season of kindness and forgiveness, after all. Save some of it for yourself.

SOURCES:

Ken Duckworth, MD, medical director, National Alliance on Mental Illness; assistant professor, Harvard University Medical School.

David Dunner, MD, director, Center for Anxiety and Depression, Mercer Island, Wash.; professor emeritus, department of psychiatry and behavioral sciences, University of Washington.

Mental Health America web site: “Holiday Depression and Stress.”

Gloria Pope, director, advocacy and public policy, Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance, Chicago.

David Shern, PhD, president and CEO, Mental Health America, Alexandria, Va.

Reviewed on October 01, 2008

Low-Calorie Holiday Recipes

Low-Calorie Holiday Recipes
How to make high-taste, low-cal holiday fare.
By Heather Hatfield

FeatureReviewed by Kathleen M. Zelman, MPH, RD, LDA typical holiday meal can mean a disaster for your diet, with an average calorie count of more than 2,500 for every festive spread you indulge in. Given that 3,500 calories equals one extra pound of weight, a few over-the-top meals, in theory, could turn into a few extra lines on the scale. Is all the merrymaking really worth a serious case of snug-fitting clothes and the winter-weight blues?

This year, a holiday meal makeover is definitely in order, meaning it’s time to deck the kitchen with healthier ingredients and lower-cal treats. With visions of skim milk, egg substitutes, pomegranate seeds, and a sprinkle of cinnamon dancing in your head, the trick is to pack in the flavor and pull out the fat -- so you can enjoy all of the tasty treats the season has to offer, without the guilt and gratuitous calories.

WebMD offers these yuletide alternatives to some traditional appetizers, drinks, and dessert. (We’ll leave the main dish to you -- since you already know to eat just the white meat on the bird and go easy on the stuffing and gravy, right?) So, this holiday, focus more on giving thanks and wrapping presents and less on the needle on the scale.

Low-Calorie Holiday Drinks
Eggnog

Eggnog is a minefield of calories -- from the heavy cream to the sugar to its main ingredient, eggs. Weighing in at around 340 calories per cup, with 19 grams of fat, this is one holiday drink that’s better left at the bar -- unless you make some serious changes. First, skip the heavy cream and use skim milk and fat-free half-and-half instead. Egg substitutes are just as good as the real deal, and a single packet of artificial sweetener can add all the flavor of a teaspoon of calorie-heavy sugar. And, since you’ve carved off the calories in all the right places -- down to about 60 calories per serving -- feel free to add 1/4 cup of brandy or rum for a little kick, or spice it up naturally with a shaving of fresh nutmeg.

Makes 4 servings

1 1/2 cups skim milk
1/2 cup fat-free half-and-half
1/2 cup pasteurized egg substitute
1 tsp vanilla
1 packet artificial sweetener
1/4 cup brandy or rum (optional)
Nutmeg (for garnish)

Combine all ingredients in a shaker or blender, or whisk to blend. Serve cold or over ice and garnish with nutmeg.

Per serving (without brandy): 64 calories, 7 g protein, 8 g carbohydrate, 0.5 g fat, 0.3 g saturated fat, 3 mg cholesterol, 0 g fiber, 144 mg sodium. Calories from fat: 7%.



Wine Spritzer

This colorful holiday cocktail is the perfect way to make merry without packing on the pounds. Start with just a splash of wine in lieu of a whole glass and add a dash of healthy pomegranate or cranberry juice, both of which are nutrient-heavy and calorie-light. Finally, throw in a touch of soda or sparkling water for a little pop.

Makes 1 serving

1/2 cup white wine
1/4 cup pomegranate or
cranberry juice
1/4 cup club soda or
sparkling water
Garnish with lime wedge

Per serving: 50 calories, 0.3 g protein, 12 g carbohydrate, 0 g fat, 0 g saturated fat, 0 mg cholesterol, 0 g fiber, 13 mg sodium. Calories from fat: 0%

Crabmeat Spread

A picture-perfect addition to any holiday spread, this crabmeat pomegranate dip is low in calories compared with the typical veggie dip. Light mayo is the only ingredient that adds a few fat calories; otherwise this holiday appetizer is protein-packed and full of flavor.

Makes 16 appetizer servings

8 oz lump crabmeat, drained and shell pieces removed
4 tbsp light mayonnaise
1 tbsp finely chopped green scallion tops or chives
1 tbsp fresh lime or lemon juice
Assorted crudités (red pepper strips, cucumber slices, and carrot sticks)
1/2 cup pomegranate seeds

Mix crabmeat with mayonnaise, scallions, and lime juice. Mound crabmeat mixture in the center of a platter and sprinkle with pomegranate seeds. Arrange colorful vegetables around the plate.

Per serving: 26 calories, 3 g protein, 0.4 g carbohydrate, 1.4 g fat, 0.2 g



Stuffed Figs

Pigs in a blanket are a holiday no-no, laden with 6 grams of fat and not a lot of nutritional value per each bite-sized portion. Stuffed figs (the figs replace the pigs) wrapped in prosciutto are delicious and nutritious -- cutting the calorie count down to 85 and the fat grams almost in half.

Makes 12 appetizer servings

12 large fresh figs (mission or any other fresh variety)
2 oz goat cheese
2 oz thinly sliced prosciutto, cut into 12 strips
2–3 oz balsamic vinegar
Cooking spray

Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Cut figs in half but not all the way through. Stuff the fig with a small scoop of goat cheese and press gently to seal. Wrap stuffed fig in a strip of prosciutto to secure cheese, tuck ends of prosciutto under fig. Place figs on a baking sheet coated with cooking spray. Drizzle balsamic vinegar over each fig. Bake figs 8 to 10 minutes; serve warm.

Per serving: 93 calories, 3.5 g protein, 14 g carbohydrate, 2.5 g fat, 1.4 g saturated fat, 9 mg cholesterol,
2 g fiber, 145 mg sodium. Calories from fat: 26%.

Low-Calorie Desserts
Apple Crisp

What’s a holiday feast without a little apple pie? It may be an age-old tradition on your table come November and December, but there’s a slimmer way to do it. While it’s not exactly lean cuisine, this crisp is certainly a step in the right direction, especially if you use a no-trans fat margarine and a sugar substitute, in lieu of the real thing. Topping out at around 220 calories and 8 grams of fat, this dessert is a big nutritional improvement with almost no sacrifice in taste.

Makes 8 servings

Topping:
1/2 cup walnuts
1/2 cup oats
1/2 cup whole-wheat flour
3 tbsp brown sugar
1/4 tsp ground cinnamon
3 tbsp no-trans fat margarine
Filling:
4 cups cored and thinly sliced apples (pippin and Granny Smith work well), firmly packed
1/4 cup sugar (or substitute 2 tbsp Splenda)
1 tsp apple pie spice
2 tbsp unbleached flour

Preheat oven to 375°. Coat a 9x9-inch baking dish, 9-inch cake pan, or deep-dish pie plate with canola cooking spray. Toast the walnuts by spreading on a pie plate and heating in oven until fragrant (about 7 minutes). Chop the nuts medium-fine.

Combine the oats, flour, brown sugar, and cinnamon in a mixing bowl. Cut margarine into the mixture until the topping resembles small peas or until crumbly. Add the chopped nuts and mix well. (The topping can be prepared up to a week ahead and refrigerated.).

Put the sliced apples in a large bowl. Add the sugar (or Splenda) and apple pie spice to a 1-cup measure, then pour over the apples and toss. Sprinkle flour over the apples and mix gently. Pour the mixture into the prepared baking dish. Spoon the topping over the apples, pressing down lightly. Place the dish on a baking sheet to catch any overflow. Bake on the center rack of oven until the topping is golden brown and the juices have thickened slightly, about 35-45 minutes.

Per serving (using Take Control margarine): 214 calories, 3 g protein, 33 g carbohydrate, 8 g fat, 1.3 g saturated fat, 0 mg cholesterol, 2.5 g fiber, 33.5 mg sodium. Calories from fat: 34%.

8 Ways You're Damaging Your Hair

8 Ways You're Damaging Your Hair
Perms, highlights, extensions: In our quest for beauty are we sacrificing the hair on our heads? Here’s a breakdown of the damage too much styling can wreak on our tresses.
By Heather Hatfield

Kristin LaVerghetta, 23, from Norton, Mass., has hair to die for. It's shiny, it's full, it has just the right amount of bounce, and worse yet, she makes it all look completely effortless.

What's her secret when it comes to having great hair, other than good genetics?

"I don't color it -- never have," LaVerghetta says. "I blow dry it every day and use a straightener sometimes, and I shampoo and condition every day, which works best for my hair type."

To protect her hair against the heat of the blow dryer, she uses hair product first. Her secret to hair success: Less is more.

Most of us aren't as kind to our tresses. From highlights to lowlights, chemical perms to chemical straightening, blow drying, braiding, and bleaching, how we treat our hair has a direct impact on how healthy -- or unhealthy -- it looks.

Causing split ends, lack of luster, or hair breakage, our styling habits play havoc on the one thing we're trying to capture -- beauty. Hair experts explain the anatomy of the tresses on our head, offer insight into the damage too much styling can cause, and give advice on how to keep your locks looking luxurious.

The Anatomy of Hair
"Hair is fiber, much like wool," says Paradi Mirmirani, MD, a staff dermatologist at the Permanente Medical Group in Vallejo, Calif. "It's bundled together tightly in the middle and protected on the outside by a cuticle."

Every hair has three layers -- the inner fibers make up the medulla; the cortex surrounds the medulla; and the cuticle is the outer layer that protects the inner, more sensitive components from damage, Mirmirani says.

Each hair grows about 1/4 inch every month out of a follicle on your head, and it can keep growing for up to six years. Then as part of the natural cycle of hair, it will fall out and make way for a new hair.

How long your hair is depends on how long your growing cycle lasts. If it's only two years instead of six, your hair will naturally peak at a shorter length. The same goes for the thickness of your hair: Thick hair grows out of large follicles; smaller, narrower follicles produce thinner hair.

Worse, for men and women alike, a person goes bald if the hair follicles that produce a new hair shrink in size or become inactive.

The circle of life for a hair, however, depends on a lot of things, and styling is one of them: The more you style, the more you change the natural makeup of your hair. And although the amount and intensity of styling a person's hair can take depends on genetics, the texture of your hair, and its coarseness, less is always more when it comes to hair health.

"If the cuticle of a hair is damaged as a result of overstyling, the inner core is exposed, causing dryness, a lack of luster, and static," Mirmirani says.

Basically, your quest for beauty backfires.
Causes of Hair Damage
So as we perm and color our way to the hair we want, when we want it, are we actually doing more harm than good to our locks? Here are eight ways our beauty habits cause hair damage:

1. Bleaching - "Bleaching your hair penetrates the cuticle with chemicals and removes your natural pigment," Mirmirani says. "You are changing the structure of your hair, making it more susceptible to damage."

Once you bleach, she explains, you've altered the strength of your hair, making it weaker. If you add blow drying and styling on top of bleaching, you can really damage your 'do, causing hair breakage, a dull look, and split ends.

2. Perms - "Perming refers to either a chemical straightening or a chemical curling," Mirmirani says. "It works by breaking the inner bonds of the hair and re-forming them back together in a different way."

Like bleaching, it weakens your hair, leaving it dull and damaged over time so that instead of luxurious curly locks or shiny straight tresses, your hair looks brittle and dry.

3. Highlights and coloring - Highlights and semi-permanent dyes aren't as damaging as bleach, but they aren't without consequences, Mirmirani says. They can also change the inner structure of the hair, causing a lackluster look and dryness, especially if you frequently color to hide roots or gray hair.

4. Flat iron and blow-drying - "Heat causes temporary changes to the hydrogen bonds that hold hair together," Mirmirani says, and that can make hair look dull.

Over time, the temporary changes can lead to more permanent damage if you tend to blow dry or iron on a daily basis.

5. Ponytails and braids - "Ponytails and braids can cause hair to break, especially if your style is pulled tightly," Mirmirani says. "If you wear it that way every day, permanent hair damage can occur."

Braiding or putting your hair in a ponytail when it's wet can cause damage sooner because wet hair is more fragile.

6. Over-brushing - Think 100 strokes a day will make your hair shiny and full? Think again.

"Over-brushing your hair can cause split ends and breakage, with the over-brushing causing just too much consistent friction for hair to handle," Mirmirani says.

Cheap brushes don't help either, causing snags and tangles that are hard to get out and resulting in broken hair and split ends.

7. Over-shampooing - "The goal of shampooing is to cleanse the scalp and remove oil buildup on your hair," Mirmirani says.

But over-washing can wash away your hair's natural moisture that helps your hair look healthy, making your hair dry. Although a significant amount of research has gone into making shampoos beneficial for your hair, you can still get too much of a good thing.
Causes of Hair Damage continued...
"The less vigorous you are in washing your hair, the less damage you'll do to the cuticle," Mirmirani tells WebMD. "And find a frequency to washing your hair that works for you ... whether it's a few times a week or every day."

How do you know when you are overdoing it?

"I have African-American patients who wash their hair once a week to avoid drying it out," Mirmirani says. "You can tell when it's too much if it starts to get dull, which means it's time to scale back on the shampooing."

8. Extensions and weaves - Extensions and weaves are a lot like ponytails and braids. Over time, they can leave hair broken and brittle. The difference is the damage is at the roots where it is harder to cut out.

"If you have a discomfort or ache in the scalp, that indicates that what you've done to your hair is causing too much pressure at the roots," Mirmirani says.

Worse, traction alopecia is a serious hair loss condition caused by wearing tight hairstyles like extensions for too long a time period. So either keep it loose, or try growing your hair instead of going for instant length.

Hair Damage Repair
"Whether it's heat, chemicals, dyes, or styling, it's all doing some degree of damage," Mirmirani says. "A good rule of thumb is, the less you do to your hair, the better."

The good news is today's products, including dyes, are much better suited to our hair than 20 years ago, with technology and research helping to make most styling products actually beneficial to our hair.

How can you undo some of the damage done through countless visits to the salon?

"There are two things you can do," Mirmirani says. "First, cut off the damaged ends and start fresh. And try reducing what you're doing. ... If you notice your hair looking dull and dry, cut back on your styling until you get your hair back."

Larry Baron, the owner and head stylist at Spa Christine in Boston, says the trick to keeping your hair healthy is to maintain its pH balance.

"In order to close the hair cuticle and bring it back to health, you need to keep its pH balance at 4.5 -- that's the level at which your hair will look its best," he tells WebMD. "When it starts to creep up, that's when it starts to look like straw."

Baron's recommendations for maximizing hair health:

Always put product on your hair before you style with heat. "By putting the product on before you style, you're heating the product, not the hair," Baron tells WebMD.
Use extensions and cornrows wisely. "If extensions or cornrows are too tight, it can damage your roots by causing too much tension," Baron says. "There's a new technique where you can have extensions glued in and then removed using baby oil, but whatever way you choose, don't overdo it -- hair is strong, but it does have a breaking point."
Cut your losses. "When your hair is really damaged and dry, amputate," Baron says. "Just cut it off and start over."